Same sex marriage. Some uncomfortable thoughts.

Firstly I need to say that I am totally in favour of same sex marriage. If I were an MP I would vote in favour. But I do question whether this is any of my business.

Some background. I am a heterosexual who has been in the same partnership for nearly 28 years. I am an atheit and do not want to make pretend vows to a God or Gods in whom I do not believe.

Nor do I want to get “married” at the local registry office. I am happy that people recognise that we are a couple who renew their vows on a daily basis and the lack of some certificate has not stopped us from weathering the ups and downs of a long term relationship.

However there are tax implications when we reach the ever near retirement age. The obvious solution? A civil partnership. Oh. Hang on. As a heterosexual couple, we are not entitled to a civil partnership….

I don’t want a ceremony. I would like equal rights to a married couple- whether heterosexual or same sex.

It seems that there is a simple solution…

Any couple- but also every couple- sign a legal document confirming their status and this is registered at the local county court.

If a couple subsequently wish to hold a marriage ceremony, in the church or location of their choice, then so be it.

Simple. It would help of course if we separated church and state so that these issues became less emotive and we did not have to waste parliamentary time debating matters of the state church…





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5 responses to “Same sex marriage. Some uncomfortable thoughts.”

  1. Kavey says :

    Oddly enough, I had similar conversation with Pete.
    If we truly wish to separate state and God, we need to have one civil partnership that is available to ALL couples, and which grants all the legal rights associated with marriage – financial, tax, medical decisions and so on.
    And then, let marriage be a separate ceremony offered by whichever institutions wish to, to whichever subsets of the population they wish to include. It would be a purely religious affair, with no bearing on legal situation.

  2. lofieye says :

    I am in a similar situation, no desire to be married, but fed up of having to declare myself single after 14 yrs of essentially being married, apart from the bit of paper & a cripplingly expensive party. Is a common law partnership a viable option? I’ve a dim memory of this, but don’t know any more facts. Have you ever looked into it?

  3. overhere1 says :

    Thanks for your comments. Unfortunately there is no such thing as a common law partnership. People who were living together but not married used to say they were in a common law marriage to try and get round the- then- stigma.

    • lofieye says :

      So we’re all staying ‘single’ then! Seems stupid when we’ve been together longer than some of our friends who’ve met, got married, then split up! Yet they can define their relationship truthfully. Don’t know how you feel, but saying I’m single feels like a betrayal to my partner and everything we’ve built together.

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